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Humorous Scripts: Global warming Author: Douglas Brown

Headline: WASHINGTON -- U.S. policy on global warming seems headed for a tipping point, with politicians, business leaders and economists joining environmentalists to call for new laws to limit greenhouse gases that spur climate change.  President George W. Bush's fleeting mention of the problem in his State of the Union address last month was seen as significant, even as he stressed alternative fuels and new technologies -- not legal limits on emissions -- as solutions. 

Source: /www.topix.net/city/washington-dc

Date: 20 February 2007

 

Script:

President George Bush (talking to Senate): Y’now those folks said that they was concerned over global warming.  An you know I’m getting a touch concerned that I have to be seen to make a move.

Senate member:  Who are “those folks” Mr President?

Bush: Y’no those enono-mat-isists and them environ o mentalists callin’ for new laws to reduce greenhouse missions an gen’rally reduce CO2 polution!

Senate: So - what do you intend to do, Mr President?

Bush: Well I’m goin’ to start by making a big impact on the problem by levying a greenhouse ermissions tax.

Senate: (very seriously) But the US industry will be the hardest hit by increased fuel taxation and the backlash from the private motorist levy could have serious repercussions!!

Bush: How will the US Industry and the private mot’rists be hit? We will target suburban greenhouses and apply a farting tax to cattle ranches.

Senate: (heads in hands) Sigh!

 

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