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Humorous Scripts: Mud or flames Author: Stuart Macfarlane

MUD OR FLAMES?

 

FIREMAN:                  Hello, we’re frae the fire brigade and that. We’re here tae put oot                                  yer fire.

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE

WOMAN:                   Oh aye? Well gonnie take aff yer boots furst?

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN:                  Whit?  

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN:                   Gonnie take those boots aff?

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN:                  Whit fur?

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN:                   Ah’ve jist hud this new kerpet put doon.

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

FIREMAN:                  But missus, yer hoose is up in flames!

 

F/X:                                                     CRACKLING OF FIRE – GETTING LOUDER

WOMAN:                   Look, jist cos ma hoose is burnin’ doon disnae mean Ah need tae let ma standards slip completely – so get thase boots aff right now.

 

END

 
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